Conscious Creation

Breathe, feel your body. Sink your awareness down. Head, neck, shoulders, heart, arms, chest, breasts, ribs, spine, solar plexus, belly, womb. Sparks in the deep belly, this is where creation comes from. For women the source of creation is from the womb, for men, the hara. The sacred space of ‘just knowing’, intuition and wisdom in the body. Sacred source or fire for life, sexuality and creation. 


For many many years I lived the pain of my conditioned belief system that ‘artists are poor’. I now know this has meant death for me. Growing up in a capitalist family I wanted and felt the need to fulfil the money = success formula, in order to feel loved and recognised. But deep down inside, I just could never do it, and my trying to conform to ideas, of what I thought others thought I should do, only lead me to dispair. For within this system I could not feel my being, soul or true nature. I was suffocated. Why, because I am not made to conform. There is something deeply profound within me that calls for raw authentic revival of truth, calls to make my life hell to show that this is not the way, calls to take me to the limits if I ignore it, calls to make me sit still and face my shadows in the mirror, one by one. 

I have learnt to believe in my free spirit and am still learning to be free from the unconscious conditioning that will forever try to find a place in my system. And the more conscious I become, I more I am able to speak conformity in the face and say ‘You have never fit me and I’m not going to try and squeeze into you anymore’. Like a bad suit, or last pair of half price designer jeans I think I will fit into one day … I wore it well, thinking I looked great in the spiritual poverty of my own misbeliefs about who I thought I was or should be, lost in the mechanisms of the mind. Fashion is not for me!

to be continued…

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